Because our results are impacted by our ability to communicate, to engage, and to collaborate with others, our inability to understand and manage our and others’ emotional reactions can get in the way of accomplishing our goals, making decisions, and solving problems. Sometimes the way we deal with “hot” or negative emotion keeps us from achieving what we really want! This webinar will help you to understand the source of emotional reactions and how to defuse those reactions to achieve more significant results.

Introduction to The Ego Has Landed

Often our ego gets in the way of how we communicate and deal with others because we become defensive. When people become defensive, their capacity to work effectively is diminished. Recognizing and managing the ego is the key to organizational and personal effectiveness.

The Impact of Thinking on Results

The process of our own perception impacts the way in which we speak and deal with others. The lens of our perception creates the mental models through which we see, interpret, and assign meaning to our own reality. Understanding our thinking is the key to understanding how we create our results.

The Physiology of Ego

The reptilian brain serves as the protective-reactive mechanism of the brain and insures our survival. The physiology of this brain function contributes to the activation of the ego and produces emotional reaction. Being able to recognize these reactions is the key to defusing emotion or defensiveness.

The Low Road of Thinking

Our thinking doesn’t do us any favors. There is a high road and low road to our thinking. Recognizing the flaws in our thinking or “brain traps” helps us recognize when we need to slow down and assess the accuracy of our thinking. Emotional or reactive thinking is devoid of rationality.

The Psychology of Ego

We interpret the events that we observe as a violation of our values or expectations. Negative or “hot” emotion signals violated values. Such emotion represents the psychology behind our thinking that can be identified and challenged in order to assess and restore our rationality.

Defusing Defensiveness

It is easy to defuse defensiveness by applying the EASE model. Being able to defuse emotional reaction is the key to increasing our understanding of the meaning that is hidden or masked by our emotions.

Using the EASE Model

Using the questions identified in the EASE model helps individuals to literally shift their thinking from protective-reactive mode to cognitive-rational mode. In the process of doing so, individuals become more clear as to the values that they perceived to have been violated.

Conclusion

This segment emphasizes the importance of recognizing our ego and how it gets in the way of creating the results we want. In essence, we suggest that individuals learn to “Ego Off!” The segment also summarizes the principles from the entire program.

During the turbulent times in which we find ourselves, most individuals are even less likely to speak up and talk about what really matters because they worry about the negative consequences they might experience from their candor. To complicate matters, each individual is unique—different from anyone else. Even though we rarely intend to offend, the way in which we think, communicate, and behave can on occasion be offensive to others. Individual differences show up in a display of different “interaction” styles that are often misinterpreted. Understanding the differences in individual styles allows us to communicate and connect in a way that enhances mutual understanding and respect. Learning to recognize “style differences” will help you connect and engage with others in ways you may never have thought possible.

In every conversation we walk the line. The “line” is the choice we have to create a REAL conversation that yields the results we desire or to engage in an interaction that yields less-than-desirable results. Every conversation we have presents an opportunity to move above the line—or fall below the line. The first key to effective conversation is to notice where we are in a conversation.